Buffett sat on the lobby floor and refused to move. |
"We felt sympathy with the Occupy Wall Street protests, but we felt left out, so we decided to stage a protest of their own," Buffett told us.
Joining Buffett in today's protest were Microsoft CEO Bill Gates, wealthy currency speculator George Soros, and NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg.
"We are fed up with ourselves, and we demand change" Mr. Gates said, echoing the sentiments of the other protesting billionaires.
The billionaires are protesting their own lavish lifestyles. They feel that the government should raise taxes on the middle class, so that the poor can have more. "There is really no point in raising our taxes," Bill Gates told us, "since we rarely pay any income taxes at all. We have lots of loopholes, deductions, and tax shelters. It's just like how Warren brags about his secretary paying more income tax than he does!"
The plan is to protest against themselves, so the real protesters will think that the billionaires are in solidarity with them. That way, they can channel their anger towards reelecting Barack Hussein Obama, D-Kenya, rather than in making any meaningful reforms.
Billionaire George Soros chimed in, saying: "The most important thing is to reelect Obama, and if necessary I will spend every penny I have to reelect him."
Billionaire George Soros and his puppet |
"I can always get the money back by investing in some phoney green project designed to bilk the taxpayers. The taxpayers will take all the risk, and I will get all the rewards!"
"I made a fortune when my Brazilian oil company started drilling for oil in the Gulf after President Obama banned American companies from drilling there."
"And I've got a big investment in this this $97,000 electric hybrid green car made in Finland. I bet I quadruple my money on that deal. These are really good times for us billionaires!"